poem

 Non Zero Chance 

Math is the language of pure objectivity

To understand the nature of being 

There are three mathematical pathways

First, the default perspective :

You can quantify yourself as magnitude

You can be five or seventeen or six thousand twenty-two
You can multiply or add, factor out the common variables 

But there’s always a higher number

So we shed what used to give pleasure

And grasp for ever higher

Fundamentally it's a disbelief in the concept of infinity

Which becomes a metaphor for "atheism"

Which gives rise to the word “god”

Which is the active participle of all ego 

Which is believed to be calculable

By a series of esoteric numerical manipulations

The second way is to turn from all quantified numericity

And embrace total zero

But there are two notions 

Of zero. The wrong one is a nihilistic nothingness

This is the path of cynicism and suicides

Why go on? You’re nothing with nowhere to go

But who’s that face in the mirror?

Who says ouch when the needle is buried?

Who weeps when the Wilco song plays?

Who grieves?

Who buys the gun?

Who says none of this is real?

It ain’t no one

The best way is the the dark side of zero

Not the decimal placeholder

Or the zero times anything is zero

But the empty set

The undefined, emptiness

Of pure absence 

The answer to any number

Divided by zero

What is a number without nothing at all?

What is nothing at all without the all?

What is love without its lacerating loss?

Take those three statements and write a formula

Take the formula and run it through a shredder

There you go

It falls like large white flakes of snow 

Now find a quiet place and count your breath

Set the timer for 20 minutes

Ask yourself: who’s counting? 

11/3/22